dreams

i had more vivid, longer and fucked up dreams in the last three days then I did in the past 3 years.

there’s nina simone playing in the cafe right now — sinnerman — from the pastel blues album.  funny i was listening to nina simone when i started walking this way.  i started at La Defense and chugged my way for two hours towards the Dali Museum — which ended up being not a museum but some shitty tourist trap of a gallery selling lithographs.  it started raining, so before heading to D’Orsay i stopped by the cafe right next door for a coffee and a gigantic 1664 beer and thought i’d write down a note no here.

anyways, back to the dreams.  i forgot the last time i had them, until now.  perhaps they’re so vivid because it feels like a shock having them. i feel like for the past 3 days i actually slept, where’s at home i sleep just to cram some rest before one of the kids randomly wakes up at 2AM and climbs into bed with us, which is usually the best scenario.

do you sleep to survive or to rest?  the last 3 days were the rest sleep type, at home it’s a sleep to survive from one day to another.  i don’t think my brain fully gets to disconnect at home for me to actually sleep and dream and process whatever the fuck it needs to process, like it happened here.  dreams i suppose are like glitches in the matrix, your brain tries to work through something on whatever you’re stuck on.

i remember 2 of the 3 day’s dreams, i know i dreamed all 3 but for the life i don’t remember what the middle day was.

first day was a dream about me getting fired, third dream was about teh aprartment we lived in on winship street in hartford.

writing

I wanted to have a blog for a very long time. I would randomly buy a domain like “mplsfoodguy” or “weliveinmpls” with an idea that I would carve out a niche and make an on-line presence dedicated to it. And I would always fail.

It would work for a little bit, the newness of it, but eventually my brain would start to wonder to some other topic and I’d lose the interest in whatever the original thought was.

I would also make up an excuse in my mind about why I can’t just start to write – the writing program that I was using wasn’t cool enough, the website layout wasn’t as clean looking as someone else’s, etc., etc. Eventually I started to realize the silliness of it all. So here I am, trying to write something, anything, just to go through the process of writing, keys on the keyboard, writing down whatever my mind will decide to spew out today.

Well, not really today, today is just the exercise of starting this, tomorrow the real ideas will flow…